Celtics-Magic Game 6

One of the coolest things about blogging is that you have your own personal time-stamped perspective out there. So everyone can see precisely how prophetic you were. Or how incredibly wrong you were. Stan Van Gundy is one home loss away from adding to the country’s record unemployment numbers. Did anyone see this coming when the series was 1-1. I did, from last blog, prior to game 3:

This is about the most irritated and personal that I have gotten, but Stan Van Gundy is a fat load of crap and his team hates his guts. Keep on screaming you loon, you’re screaming your team right out of the playoffs and right out of a job. Well, at least there’s that porn thing to fall back on, assuming he can still find it down there.

I’m so pleased with my analysis, I won’t even gloat any further. Here’s why the Magic are cooked. They hate their coach. You can’t be having public apologies and meetings the day before game six to get the coach and star player on the same page. Shaq nailed it when he called SVG the master of panic. He panics, spreads the tension to his team, and then they choke. All he had to do was not be SVG, and this series would be over. The Celtics have played consistently below par, and they are one win away. I would give anything to see Shaq behind the Orlando bench tonight. Doesn’t he live down there?

Here’s why this thing is over in six. 5 for 29. That’s what Ray Allen has shot from 3 point land in this series. It has to end sometime, and that sometime is tonight. Well, that’s part of it. The reality is that there will come a point in the game when the Magic will face adversity and their loony coach will be screaming and flailing his arms and generally doing his enraged Homer Simpson impression. And each Magic player will have some derivative of the following thought: "I’m so tired of this effing imbecile screaming. He’s blown the last two games, if he would just shut the eff up, we’d be in Cleveland right now." And that will be that. You don’t bleed for a guy you hate. You don’t leave it all out on the court.

There will come a point when everything is going wrong that the players will collectively and silently come to the only possible conclusion, which is that "with a new coach, next year, we’ll be unstoppable." And that will be that. I am going way out on a limb here as the Celtics have been unfathomably inconsistent. But, nonetheless, it’s over. SVG finished it.

The Celtics have played with as much heart as any other team in any sport under any set of circumstances. Their bench consists of two points guards and Brian Scalabrine. Nobody else plays. Alright, granted that under 6 foot Eddie House is really a shooting guard, but that obscures the point. They have a back up point guard who has been out of basketball for the better part of two years and an under sized back up shooting guard, PLUS, the white guy with the padded head band to protect from future concussions. This is a truly unprecedented and unparalleled run.

Quick thought on Perkins. He has defensively dominated Dwight Howard. Feed Howard the ball, keep feeding him the ball. And he can keep taking that running left handed ugly-assed hook shot that keeps clinging off the backboard. Perkins’ performance with an injured shoulder has been staggering. He has dominated Dwight Howard. Howard should feel humiliated. Watch the Magic "love" their coach after tonight’s game.

I told my wife before the playoffs that I felt something special might be coming from the Celtics. The 2008 title run was amazing as we watched the Celtics struggle through as they learned how to be a playoff team together. But this year’s Celtics have one thing that the 08 team never had. They are massive underdogs. Most picked the Bulls to beat them. Nearly everyone picked the Magic to beat them. The experts will tell you the Celtics will be lucky to lose by less than 50 per game to Cleveland.

Getting to Cleveland, which is now inevitable, will be an extraordinary achievement for this team. And I don’t want to say the G-word, so I won’t. But let’s just say that if there was zero chance he could come back, he would have already had the surgery. Never say never. It would be as big an upset as I can remember, but that’s wherein the fun lies. How many times do you have to watch a 1-AA team play Michigan, or a 32 point NFL playoff game deficit until the impossible happens? Until Michigan loses or the Bills complete the biggest comeback in NFL history? How many? Just enough times, until you finally see it happen. That’s, in large part, why we watch. And if you watch long enough, you will eventually see the impossible.

I’m not going to go crazy, but I will say this. Cleveland will not have played a competitive game in the better part of a month, by the time the Conference Finals roll around. They have not faced any adversity. They have not been under pressure. Just saying. It ain’t over before they suit em up. LeBron’s foul count is up to 20 in his last 19 games after another 3 in game 4. Try this one on for size. Lebron has had 3 fouls in both game 4's this year. Game 4's in which the series were over and the opponents had already packed. Refs evening up a little after calling almost no fouls for the first three games? Seems so. Throw out those six in two, and Lebron would have 14 fouls in his last 17 games.

There should be an investigation. Where’s Oliver Stone when you need him? Doctor Phil anyways. I think it’s more feelings related. Can’t control the Leb-Lust.