Saturday, January 10, 2009

Divisional Playoff Weekend

Picks (Home team in CAPS)
I’ll kill the suspense and lay it all out on the table from the outset. The four divisional winners this weekend will all be road teams. How can this possibly happen? 3 severely flawed home teams and one lightning in a bottle road team that cannot be stopped.

We’ll start with my favorite to pick and my favorite quarterback to heap on.

Chargers +6 over STEELERS

Chargers are the AFC’s unstoppable team of destiny this year. With Manning out of the way, the 3 remaining AFC teams not from Southern California have utterly mediocre offenses. No big play ability. Also ran QB’s. (All due respect to future star Joe Flacco, but he is not there yet.) Let’s talk about Roethlisberger, aka, the Big Fraud. His first year without a dominant offensive line that protected him like a porcelain doll and forced 8 defenders in the box to fight an unstoppable running game. Their best lineman gone to the Jets, this Steelers O-line is a shell of its former self. The Fraud has a made a career out of down the field plays against run suspecting defenses. This year, for the first time in his career, the Steelers running game is not terrifying anybody. The result, a level playing field. You know, what Manning, Warner, Brady and just about every other QB in the league has had to face every week. Defenses not selling out 100% for the run.

And how did the Big Fraud do. Under 60% completions. 17 TD’s, 15 INT’s and barely an average of 200 yards per game. He ain’t that good, he never was. Chargers defense is rounding into form nicely at the perfect time. In the Fraud’s four regular season losses this year, to the Eagles, Giants, Colts and Titans the Fraud threw 10 interceptions compared to his 3 touchdowns. What does this tell you? None of you should be surprised about what is coming here. The Chargers are road playoff tested and have already played in Pittsburgh in front of the rabid hanky waving yahoos. Not going to phase him one bit. Norv Turner is going to get out of his own way and not send LT out there with his walker. Sproles, or as I like to call him, Speedy Gonzalez, cause he’s not only that fast but just about that big is a unique weapon. Do not underrate how important the "we can’t frickin see the guy" factor is.

Get ready to feel sad again Steelers fans. It’s coming. This will not be easy and it will be close with the Big Fraud wasting as good a defense as we have seen this decade. But by avoiding the big mistake, the Chargers will prevail due to the inevitable Big Fraud brain farts. The Big Fraud will show his true colors. The concussions have dumbed him down to a Brett Favre level. And you know what that means. Big mistakes in big games. And by the way, the Big Fraud led the league in lost fumbles this year.

Chargers 20-13

Ravens +3 over TITANS

The old adage is that defense wins championships and it was never more true than last year with the Giants stunning Brady and Co. But you do not win titles without an offense that can score and big play ability. The Titans have neither. Scraping by in close game after close game all year. Depending on their stupendous defense and excellent running game. The problem here, they’re a poor man’s Ravens. Ravens defense is better and while Ravens will have just as hard a time running, is there anyone out there that thinks the Titans can actually run at all in this game? Ed Reed is the equivalent of a heat seeking missile in finding opposing QB passes over the last 8 or so weeks. The chances Kerry (Strug) Collins doesn’t throw at least one INT to Reed? Somewhere between slim and none and you know where Slim is.

The Titans were +141 points-wise on the season. Throw out the +61 against the Lions and Chiefs and you get a better measure of where this team was all year. Just scraping by, particularly against good teams. They are the single least intimidating 1 seed of all time. A three point favorite means this would be an even line on a neutral field. And we all know how intimidating Nashville in January is.

The Ravens have the better QB, by far, and the better defense. This equals road win number two for the Ravens. Good riddance to Jeff Fisher’s Titans. They’ve been boring for as long as I can remember and I enjoy picking against them almost as much as I do pointing out the real skill level of the Big Fraud.

Ravens 20-6

Cardinals +9.5 over PANTHERS

The premise here is that the NFC South was terribly overrated this year. Buccaneers, meh. Falcons, nice story but a year away. And the big bad Panthers with their intimidating 8-0 home record. What exactly made up that 8-0? Well, obviously the three division wins. A 27-23 toss up to these very same Cardinals. The other 4 you ask? Chicago, KC, Detroit and the end of season Broncos, also known as Quitty McGee. No player has ever gotten more bump out of a single game than Jake Delhomme did out of his Superbowl loss to the Patriots. Jake with his 15 TD’s and 12 INT’s in '08. For his career, below 60% completion and under 86 QB rating. Again, he ain’t that good. He’s never been that good. And since no one ever seems to remember this, when he went crazy in the 2nd half of the Superbowl against the Patriots, the Patriots had lost player after player in the secondary and Delhomme put up his 300+ yards against a bunch of nobodies. This was so troubling to Belichick that he taught WR Troy Brown how to play defense the next year. And he’s been living on that single half ever since.

The running game of the Panthers you say. How can it be stopped by lowly Arizona? Panthers did have the number 3 running offense in the league this year. You know who was number 2, the Falcons, who the Cardinals completely stuffed last week. So don’t buy into the Cardinals can’t stop the run argument. They stopped a better run offense last week with a better QB. And the key to beating the Panthers is just keep Steve Smith double covered. You either just shut him down, or, if you’re lucky, he blows his stack. He has to be one of the most praised head cases in the history of the league. No, he didn’t just punch out a teammate and get suspended by the team this year. He has taken himself mentally out of many and games even gotten himself tossed in a huge Cowboys game last year as he flipped out on an official.

The Cardinals have been pacing themselves. Their division was wrapped up about six weeks in. They mailed in the end of the season and came out rejuvenated against the Falcons. They are reveling in the "everybody thinks we stink" mentality. They have a legitimate, prime time QB. Boldin not going would be a blow, but they have other weapons. Edgerrin is fresh and rested for the playoffs, and most importantly, getting the ball. The team nobody respects will beat the team that nobody ever watches. Unfortunately, this will be the lowest rated Saturday night playoff game ever. But it will still be an exciting upset. The weather at kickoff, 52 with scattered showers. While the Cards have been horrendous going east all year, there’s a difference between coming east in the middle of the grinding and exhausting regular season and going east for one game to go to the Conference championship.

Cardinals 27-24.

Eagles +4 over GIANTS

Both teams have speedy, talented crazy blitzing defenses. Playoff tested and experienced QB’s and coaches. Division rivals who know each other inside and out. Neither will be intimidated. Eagles have already won at the Meadowlands this year. Eagles are peaking like last year’s Giants. The difference that will tip this game to the Eagles can be summed up in one word: Plax. Or the absence thereof.

Giants gave this diva a huge contract and expected him to stop behaving like a selfish ass. And they were so scorned by his refusal to do so and idiotic behavior with weapons that they shut him down for the season. We’re the Giants, the world champs. We have the best running game, Superbowl MVP QB, best defense coordinator. We don’t need him. The problem for the Giants is that this is not last year’s defense. Missing significant pieces of last year’s Brady stymieing defense. Giants blitzes will inevitably lead to Brian Westbrook in a favorable matchup and he will make them pay.

Add Plax into this equation and the Giants win hands down. Plax makes the Giants offense nearly unstoppable. Plax prevented teams from stacking up to stop the run. He’s gone and in his place are 13 year veteran Amani Toomer (getting slower with every step) and the also-rans. It changes the entire way in which the Giants can attack, and are accordingly defended. You blitz Manning with Plax out there and he just tosses it up for grabs and it is a first down or better. You blitz him now with below average receivers and you are looking at another Asante pick six.

Eagles 27-21

Four road winners. You only heard it here.

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