There’s a Little Too Much Sage in that Recipe

 

There are endless reasons to watch to sports religiously.  Staggering athletic achievements, great comebacks, unbelievable coaching gaffes or even officials blowing games with insane calls.  When it all comes down to it, we watch because you can and will see something amazing that you have never seen happen before, if you watch long enough.  I remember not giving up on the Bills down 35-3 in the playoffs to Houston and seeing the greatest comeback in NFL history, a record which likely will never be broken.  This week, we had one of these I can’t believe what I just saw moments, one that every Texans fan will never forget as long as he lives. 

 

With 3:52 to go in the 4^th quarter, with the ball and a 10 point lead, Sage Rosenfels completely lost his mind.  This wasn’t a mental lapse, or a poor decision, or even a split second blunder, this was a full onset of temporary insanity.  If Sage had committed a crime (sorry Texans fans, it does not count as one no matter how much it hurts) he would beat the charge with the insanity defense.  There is no other way to describe what happened. 

 

Having just kicked the living crap out of the Colts all day long, their nemesis that they have beaten just once in their history, it all came apart in the moment that Sage Rosenfels lost his mind.  They had scored 27 unanswered points at one point and were still safely ahead by 10 with under 4 minutes to go.  All you need to do is not give up a defensive touchdown and you are almost assured of winning.  The Texans had been beating up Peyton all day.  He showed no signs of putting up the two long drives necessary to beat the Texans in the time remaining.  It was over, just about.  The most significant win in Texans history.  A break out game for Sage who surely would have taken Matt Schaub’s job, he’s always played better anyways in his stints.  This could have been the game that won Sage a starting job.  He could have become a multi-millionaire and a celebrity.

 

But it all slipped away in the split second that Sage lost his mind.  With 3:52 go and the 10 point lead.  With the ball on a 3^rd & 10.  Sage broke out of the pocket and started running toward the first down marker.  For a second it looked like he would make it.  And then three defenders began closing in on him like piranhas after Michael Moore falls overboard in the Amazon.  Sage could have slid.  He even could have dove head first and absorbed some abuse and all would have still been fine.  He was never going to make the first down either way.  Just go down, the clock continues to trickle down and Peyton gets the ball back with bad field position and under 3 minutes to go.  But something else happened.

 

Sage made a decision that will no doubt haunt him and everyone that loves him for the rest of his life.  Can’t you just see him in bar 50 years from now drowning his sorrows in discount beer and lamenting how he blew his one big chance to be a star when he lost his mind?  As the three defenders closed in, Sage decided that he was going to try to make the first down.  A noble choice, not the brightest given the situation, but certainly not insanity.  This is where it all went so wrong for poor Sage. 

 

He decided he was a hybrid of Jim Brown, Bob Beamon and Greg Louganis all at the same time.  Jim Brown because he thought he could get by all three defenders.  Bob Beamon because he thought he could jump a really long way if he hit the board just right.  And Greg Louganis because this was a face forward platform dive if I have ever seen one.  Only Sage didn’t smack his face on the platform, although he would have been better off if he had.  Sage jumped straight up into the air and once he was airborne he became a human crash test dummy.  First one, then the second and finally a third defender all nailed Sage as he now spun helplessly 5 feet in the air.  The ball, of course, dropped out and was returned for a touchdown.  Sage savagely came crashing to the ground his helmet smacking the ground Louganis on platform style.  And he watched helplessly as his career slipped away in the hands of the Colt defender storming down the sideline.  “What in the name of holy hell did I just do?” could be the only possibly thought going through his head.  He had made it 56+ minutes into a perfect game, a career and season defining victory.  Maybe he was just thinking something more along the lines of the carnival music as his scrambled brain tried to reboot.

 

If this wasn’t bad enough.  Sage had not one, but two more turnovers left in him for the conclusion of the game.  With the ball back and under 3 minutes now to go, with a 3 point lead, Sage again left the pocket.  Give him credit, this time he did not try to half pike over a litany of defenders.  He damn sure wasn’t going to try that again.  So as he rolled and approached the line of scrimmage, he slowed up.  Waiving the ball around like a pageant winner waiving a tissue in a parade to the passing crowd.  Sure enough, as he slowed up because he wasn’t going down field again, he was stripped from behind.  Colts get the ball.  Peyton takes them in for the go ahead score.  Sage gets the ball back one more time in desperation time and throws an interception to end all hope for Texans fans, all hope for his dream to be a starter, and any possibility of not being haunted by this moment for a life time. 

 

This was as mind blowing a turn of events as one will ever see.  Good quarterbacking is about good decision making as much as anything else.  Sage made just about the single worst decision a human being can make on a football field short of shooting a couple guys in the face “The Last Boy Scout” style.  It was just really sad.  We seemed to be watching the emergence of yet another come out of nowhere back up QB resurrection story.  Ah la Brady and Romo.  But no, it all came crashing down in that split second.  We feel for you Sage.  Everybody out there having a beer at the end of a tough day, raise your glass to Sage.  He’ll need all the support he can get..